When you learn about eating disorders in Jr. High or in
health class you learn that they are life threatening and
that you can "never recover." I would like to emphasize
that, while the former can be quite true, the latter is
not! I don't know if I realized that as I suffered from it
myself, but I must've known somehow, as I kept trying. If
you have a disease like an eating disorder, there may not
be pills to cure you, but within your own personal desire
and hard work, and along with the people around you, lies
your cure; recovery may not be cut and dry, but it is
possible. You can fully recover from an eating disorder.
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I was in and out of the hospital with different
ailments
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Can you imagine having a disease that has no cure, from
which you will suffer for the rest of your life? one which
affects you both physically and emotionally and affects
everything you do and everyone with whom you interact?
What a terrible prognosis! Again, you can fully recover
from an eating disorder. This is the message I bring to
people who have an eating disorder and those who have
concerns about them. Even when the inner battle seems too
difficult and an end doesn't even appear, it will.
Low immunity
When I was in and out of the hospital with different
ailments that were the result of a very low immune system,
when my 85 pounds could not support my 5'6" frame, it
seemed that an end might not be possible. Even at twice
that weight, though, I wasn't going to die of heart failure,
I still felt failure within. When I faced numerous
therapists and even eating disorder group therapies, I
still could not envision hope or help. It wasn't until I
found the right kind of therapy that I realized that the
girls who did not want to recover whom I had encountered in
those eating disorder groups were not what I wanted to be.
Something turned around inside of me—not all at once, but
in slow and gradual steps.
Now, when I think back to who I was (and it wasn't the
person I am now, by any means) I am thankful to my friends
who stuck by me, my family, and to Abbie. I am incredibly
proud of who I am and what I've become, of the progress
I've made, and of how I've left those eating disordered
months and years so far behind. The eating disordered
ways, the behaviors and the thinking never linger, not even
for a fleeting thought or a moment.
Finding balance
Before and during the eating disorder, I had been a
competitive runner, a prize winner for my school and renown
in my state. I had to leave my running behind for many
years during and following my recovery. As long as it was
part of the eating disorder, I had to keep the sport I
loved at bay. At times, I tried to go back to it and could
not, recognizing that I couldn't run and be healthy.
Finally, as I grew healthier, I learned to be able to
balance it all. I have completed 3 marathons lately and,
while I would not have done it if I felt the pernicious
control of the eating disorder creeping back, I was finally
able to run them in a healthy way, to go back to the sport
I love in a new way, completely apart from the eating
disorder. I think this is how I really knew that I was
fully recovered.
I want to shout out and tell the world that you can
recover. Please, please remember: You can fully recover
from an eating disorder! Don't lose sight of that.
Thanks for the Support
Thank you Abbie, Mom, Jimmy and Ben, Nana and Kristin- my
biggest supporters throughout. And thank you to those who
stayed around to support me throughout. When Abbie said,
early on, that someone with an eating disorder isn't
capable of giving love to anyone else because of being
consumed emotionally by the disorder and the depression and
obsessions that go with it, I knew I wanted out. I have
too much love to give to be someone who cannot give it.
Though I lost some wonderful people along the way, I also
gained closer relationships with those who stayed by me
throughout the recovery. Best of all, I re-found myself.
I know who I am and I love whom I have become. I have my
life back. Thank you so much to them all!
Psychotherapist Abigail H. Natenshon has specialized in the treatment of eating disorders with individuals, families, and groups for the past 31years. She is the author of When Your Child Has An Eating Disorder, A Step-by-Step Workbook For Parents And Other Caregivers, Jossey-Bass, 1999. Based on hundreds of successful outcomes, this book shepherds concerned parents step-by-step through the processes of eating disorder recognition, confronting the child, finding the most effective treatment for patient and family, and evaluating and insuring a timely recovery. A guide to eating disorder prevention, this book is useful to parents, health professionals and school personnel alike in countering the pervasive epidemic of unhealthy eating and body image concerns, and destructive media and peer influences. Her work can be reviewed further at www.empoweredparents.com and www.empoweredkidZ.com,
www.treatingeatingdisorders.com.
